Half-Life of a Nobody
Published: 2001 Feb 06
Categories: Ars Poetica, Icarian
I have no father who tends and cares for me.
I have no Heavenly Father in whom to believe.
I have only my mother, who resides on Earth,
And Gaia, Mother Nature, who helped raise me.
Half of me is dead, shrouded in mystery.
When my father left us and carried with him
His past, my past, the history of our family,
That was when I forever lost my identity.
I have long endeavored to find that person
Who will stand with me by my side
And fill the void where my father was to be?
She would be my soul mate, wherever she may reside.
Though Mother, I look upon you for hope in order to find her,
Please point me in the right way for I have only half a heart,
Half a soul, my judgment severed in half, and my emotions split in two,
Somehow working together for moments at a time,
The rest of the time remaining aloof from one another.
How can I find that person who can complement my missing half?
Perhaps I’ve found her.
She is Suffering,
And we shall walk together in the afterlife for an eternity or more.
I am a diseased branch of the tree of life,
Made to suffer, for no one should suffer more than I can
And therefore my goal and duty in life
Is to help, raise, and lift the spirits of the sufferers,
To take in their pain as my own pain
To die a thousand deaths for them so that they may
Find happiness and look forward towards the future,
Instead of their innumerable troubles of today.
When finally all the toxins within the Tree of Life
Is collected as a bud within me,
Send me off to the depths of Hell,
Cut off the diseased branch
Which plagues mankind for countless generations,
For I shall sacrifice myself for the good of the people,
And perhaps I shall be able to please my father,
Whom I never knew;
And please my Heavenly Father,
Whom I’ve lost faith in.
Mother, I am ready to rejoin you within the earth.
Live in peace my friends.
You will not realize that I am missing
Nor will you realize why,
Because to you I don’t exist.
But I have saved you, and perhaps,
That is the greatest gift I can give you all
And the greatest joy I can get out of it.
